Today I just want to give up...I want to stop getting treatment, stop driving to Seattle constantly, stop having scans, stop taking 20 pills before bed, stop unsuccessful IV pokes, blood draws, stop walking like a dork, stop struggling up stairs, stop shrinking inch by inch, stop wearing a wig, stop feeling useless,stop hearing the Dr say that I am not a textbook case when I want to be a textbook case,stop wondering if every ache or pain is cancer spreading or not.
I also want to stop having a numb spot on my chin which lead to an "orbital" MRI which is scheduled for Monday.I don't want to hear what the Dr has to say and I especially don't want to hear it if it's bad.
Am I cranky?....I suppose a little.
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