Cancer Club for Mankind




Hi there and welcome to the club. You might be surprised to learn that our club grows by over 3,400 members a day. Most people join against their will…for a few, membership was optional, but they joined anyway…..odd, but true.

As a new member you get to experience things like, fear and panic, uncontrolled sobbing…. waiting for things like test results, facing your mortality etc….

The next phase of membership typically requires loss….loss of your hair, loss of your lunch, loss of body parts or organs…
Other losses include loss of control and loss of pride. These last two can actually be seen as positives so be sure to consult with some of our longstanding club members on the benefits of the last two.

While a club member you will receive lots of little brown prescription bottles, beautiful flowers and an amazing number of cards. You will receive a surprisingly informative lesson on your blood and the secrets it contains…and more hours in your bed then you thought possible.

You will also receive many life lessons. These are very helpful and we suggest that while you are spending so much time off your feet, that you take advantage of that special offer.

We also ask of our club members that after you have been with us for a while, you offer your new found knowledge and encouragement to our newer members. This is an important part of healing for both you and the newer inductees.

We are sorry about your club membership but will be praying for you daily.

Cancer Club for Mankind


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