The Secret Ingredient

kindred spirit {noun};  a person who shares

beliefs, attitudes, feelings or features with

another; also called a kindred soul.

Via

Imagine life in 1975.

Gerald Ford was president of the USA.

Margaret Thatcher was elected the first

woman leader of the British Conservative Party.

Bill Gates and Paul Allen created a little

company called Microsoft....

The Vietnam War ends.

Gasoline was 44 cents a gallon;

{0.72 Pounds Stirling}.

There was global runaway inflation ~

Jaws was a Hollywood blockbuster

and Elton John was crooning about

Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds.

Saturday Night Live debuted on U.S. TV.

Via


Imagine six girls in 1975.

One was in junior high, living a suburban Chicago life.

One was in primary school, living in a small village in

Scotland with her disabled mom and grandparents.

One was a fresh-faced career girl from Queens,

living a Holly-G0-Lightly life in Manhattan.

One was a toddler being doted on by her parents and

 older brothers in the farm country of Central Illinois.

One was a tween, thriving in the lush landscape 
of beautiful New Zealand.

And then there was me,

a shy book worm, preparing to move

 to yet another new U.S. town.

Via

All are now friends of mine.

Different ages, different upbringings.

small towns

large cities

USA

abroad

Despite our very disparate childhoods,
 three plus decades down the road,  I love

each of these dear girls like family.

Via


What is it that attracts

kindred spirits?

The secret ingredient, so to speak?

I read a great article* recently that 
explains the Japanese word for the

chemical attraction or secret ingredient

that bonds two people together as 
friends. It's called kenzoku.  


According to the author of this essay,
 kenzoku {the literal translation is family}
 implies the presence of the deepest connection 

of friendship, as lives lived as comrades 

from the distant past.  He also goes on to 

say that when you are lucky enough to find 

these friends, They're like priceless gems.  

They're like finding home.

Via


I was reassured by the idea that this secret

ingredient ~ kenzoku ~ transcends even

time and distance.  Ever noticed how you can

 be away from certain friends for a very long

time, yet pick right back up when you are

together again, as if no time had elapsed? 

That would be kenzoku.

Like so much of the grace that has touched

my life, I can't pinpoint the exact moment

that these friends transformed from mere
acquaintances to buddies to kenzoku.  

But it happened.

When I was a little girl, I used to think to 

myself that somewhere out in the wide

world a boy who I'd someday call my

own was growing up and living his life ~

a life that didn't yet include me ~ just

like I was.  But I never really thought 

about potential friends in that same way,
 unless we were getting ready to move.

Just think, there is a little girl your age

who doesn't know yet that she is about

to meet her next best friend, my mom

would soothe me as we prepared to

leave one place and move to the next.

And she was right.

But in the end, none of them 

were kenzoku.

No, those little girls didn't come into

 my life until they were all grown  up. 

 But come along, they did. 

I like to think that there is no finite 

number on kenzoku and that there 

are still more out there, living their

lives until we discover each other

and I gather them into the fold.

My flock, my tribe, my peeps.

Via


I heard that Elton John song on

the radio this morning and it made

me smile, to think of 1975 and

the unique lives that my friends

and I were living, long before our

paths would cross and that secret

ingredient would bind us to one
 another.  


I'm betting that you also have
special songs you associate with
 your kenzoku.  Crank up
that virtual radio; I'd love it 
if you'd share them with me!

xx

Suzanne


PS:  Are you a collector?
I am!  Two of my peeps
have suggested that I blog
about this topic, so next
Tuesday I'll give you a glimpse
of what I collect.  Since sharing
makes it twice the fun,
I'm hosting my first linky
party so we can all sneak a
look at the things we love 
to amass : )  I hope you
will join me!

You can read more
about kenzoku,

 here.

Posted in friendship